REGRET, WITH MATH

 

by Greg Stolze

Terry is planning his classes and the cosmos splits in two.

Terry is a short, portly guy attending a small liberal arts college in the American Midwest.  He’s average, handsome in a certain light, homely from an unflattering angle.  He’s a sophomore and hasn’t had an opportunity to develop confident opinions about beer brands or a sophisticated understanding of wine.  But in the course of making one simple decision, he divides everything there is.

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This is a science fiction story, but it doesn’t have aliens or ray guns or time travel.  It’s science fiction because it’s based on an unproven possibility arising from observations of subatomic particles.  The math and thinking are hard to understand, and anyhow they’re irrelevant.  What matters is the conclusion.  What matters is the idea that the universe splits with every decision.

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CAREFUL, SHE BITES

 bite me photo: bite me biteme.jpg

by Greg Stolze

So, what’re you in for? Anorexia, bulimia? Oh c’mon, you got the look. Don’t pretend you don’t hear me.

You want to be a bitch, keep acting that way, but don’t look to the staff to put me away. That’s Fat Carey. He’s retiring in two months and can’t be bothered to fill out incident reports. 

They’re gonna eat you up and spit you out in group, you know. I’m sure you’re familiar with that, huh? Eating and spitting?

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